I’ll be the first to admit that her floppy ears and also doe-eyed gaze are irresistible, however when man’s finest friend is stealing the spotlight from man’s girlfriend, we have actually a serious problem. I love my boyfriend’s dog, yet is it too a lot to ask that I get the very same amount of attention as her? I won’t provide the classic “it’s me or the dog” ultimatum, just throw me a metaphorical bone below.
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She gets the initially greeting once my boyfriend gets home.
As shortly as he walks through the door, he rolls around the floor with her, showers her with kisses, and also picks her up for an epic bear hug. By the moment he gets about to greet me, he’s literally tired all of his power. I obtain a peck on the lips (while she’s still resting on his hip prefer a toddler) and also he’s off to the bedroom to adjust. On one hand also, I’m obtaining a sneak peek into the type of doting father he’ll be sooner or later, which is adorable; on the other, I want to be the one that’s picked up and also showered with kisses, dammit! Rolling on the floor would certainly be nice too if you recognize what I suppose.
She sleeps in between us in bed.
She even sleeps under the covers… horizontally. Her hot doggie breath is not the type of heavy steam I’m searching for in between the sheets, you guys. I acquire approximately 3 inches of space on the bed and also if I try to relocate her, she offers me severe side-eye. The initially few nights I invested through him, she chewed on my arm for a solid 3 hours. She only stopped out of sheer fatigue.
We just go on dog-friendly vacations.
I love getting ameans with my boyfriend and it doesn’t really matter wbelow we go, as long as we’re together. But just as paleas take kid-free getameans, we need to prioritize vacation time without our four-legged, attention-craving sidekick. Whenever we take a weekend pilgrimage, it hregarding be within driving distance and to a dog-friendly hotel. Is she secretly a detachable body part of his that I’m unmindful of?
The dog has damaged the mood more times than I deserve to count.
When we start to fool approximately on the couch, she either stands creepily in the edge to watch like a possessed dog from Pet Sematary
or jumps up on the couch thinking it’s play time. Obviously, we both feel weird and also attempt to relocate to the bedroom, to which we are followed, and also just favor that, the minute is gone. She’s the canine variation of a cock block and also it’s actually the worst.
Our dates are always cut brief because he hregarding acquire home to her.
We’ve never before stayed out past 10 p.m. Ever. If we ever before arrangement to, I would bet you a hundred bucks that he’d hire a dog sitter. He glances at his watch every five minutes to make certain that we aren’t gone longer than he promised her. Does he think she deserve to tell time?
He doesn’t have actually the heart to punish her and will certainly provide me the cold shoulder if I carry out.
God forbid I forobtain to stop to her in a gentle, high-pitched tone. He virtually accsupplies me of animal abusage. What he doesn’t understand is that I sneak her pieces of my dinner under the table, provide her 20-minute massages when he’s ameans, and rotate a blind eye once she chews on his wallet. But if she chews my shoes, you bet I’ll be raising my voice.
He short articles even more photos of the 2 of them together on social media than us. Seriously, that are you dating below, dude? His Instagram account is filled via selfies at the dog park, selfies on the couch and also, most notably, the glamorous portraits of her staring longingly out the window. When he ultimately does write-up a photo of us, I have a dual chin or frizzy hair. She’s means prettier than me.
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She gets even more of a birthday celebration that I perform.
We celebrate the day she was born (which he picked at random because she’s a rescue) AND the day she was adopted. She gets a princess hat, dog-friendly ice cream and also a trip to the fanciest dog park in tvery own. When it’s my birthday, I need to drag him out of the residence to dinner. As he leaves, she looks down at the ground like one of the sanctuary puppies from the ASPCA commercials. He has actually a 10-minute conversation through her around just how quickly he’ll be earlier. Can you feeling that I’m rolling my eyes?
I’m pretty sure she’s jealous of me also.
OK, so I don’t stop dog, but I’m fairly specific that she feels the exact same means I perform. I gain the evil eye from her once I cuddle up too close to him and also she provides her nose to sepaprice us once we’re holding hands. One time she left her jagged bone in the specific spot that I action off the bed in the morning. She kbrand-new exactly what she was doing and might even be plotting to kill me. In a way, I feel for her because we’re going via the same thing. Then I remember that I’m the huguy.
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